Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
