oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
