OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
