my sisters under your porch take her home
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Randomize
