It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
that is very illegal...i love you.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
