D3 body, D1 cock
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
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