When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize