alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
