soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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