Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
