You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize