Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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