Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
