She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I think your dad took our porno
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
do nipples grow back?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
