he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
