The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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