is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
