some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
