How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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