don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
vagina is talking i cant
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
