It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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