You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
do nipples grow back?
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