Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
