the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
