As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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