Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize