is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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