This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize