I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
