If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
