I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
