Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Quick, to the slutcave!
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
17 year olds will be the death of me.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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