i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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