Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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