So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
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