Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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