sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
