We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
you made out with another girl for some wings
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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