is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
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