Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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