We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
