bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
