dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize