i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
