At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize