Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
