There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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