I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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