She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Randomize
