yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize