D3 body, D1 cock
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
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