so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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